Marriage, Motherhood, and Mental Health

Marriage and motherhood have shaped my adulthood in ways I never could have prepared for.

I rushed into both before I really knew who I was. And while I don’t regret the blessings that came with it, the truth is—building a marriage and raising children while still trying to figure myself out has been heavy.

For a long time, I compared my journey to everyone else’s. Other moms who seemed more put together. Other women who looked like they had found themselves before stepping into these roles. And comparison only deepened the depression I was already fighting. It made me feel behind. It made me feel like I was failing.

There were moments I broke down under that pressure. Times I lashed out at the people I love most. Times I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize myself. I felt like I had lost “me” in the roles of wife and mom, and guilt became my shadow.

But over time, I’ve learned something life-changing: I can’t be good for anyone if I’m not good to myself first.

That has meant facing the truth of my mental health. It’s meant forgiving myself for not knowing everything, for stumbling, for being young and unprepared for how much this would stretch me. It’s meant pouring into myself—so I can pour into my children from a place of wholeness instead of emptiness.

Now, I no longer believe being a good mom means giving until I have nothing left. I believe it means protecting my peace, filling myself with love, and learning to extend grace to myself as much as I extend it to others. Marriage and motherhood have broken me open, yes—but they’ve also pushed me to grow, to heal, and to discover the woman I’m still becoming.

So to the woman who rushed into it all before really knowing herself: I forgive her. I honor her. She was doing the best she could with what she knew. And now, I choose to keep growing—for me and for them.

✨ If you’re struggling with depression or feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone. Here are a few resources that can help:

Because being a good mom doesn’t mean being perfect.

It means forgiving yourself and protecting your peace. 💙

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